Do You NEED Connect?
Four out of ten people in Calgary are, or have been in relationships that are abusive or show signs of abuse. Almost half of Calgarians have experienced some form of sexual abuse.
Healthy relationships and experiences between people are respectful, trusting, supportive, honest, fair and non-threatening. Unhealthy relationships and experiences are disrespectful, unsupportive and can involve everything from emotional and psychological control to physical violence, sexual abuse and assault. At Connect, we will provide support and information about any type of relationship or experience.
We understand that sometimes getting the help you need can be scary, embarrassing or just confusing. But Connect is none of those things. We’re a friendly, easy confidential service that helps you — or someone you know — find the support you need. It’s for anyone who needs help and the people who care about them.
Unhealthy Relationships and Experiences
We all have many relationships throughout our lives - with family, friends, partners, and people in the community. And they come in all shapes and sizes. Our day-to-day lives are made up of a variety of experiences with lots of different people.
Relationships and experiences help to shape who you are. Healthy relationships and experiences build you up, make you feel safe, happy, capable and truly cared for. Unhealthy relationships and experiences can leave you feeling scared, betrayed, cheap, small and unsure of yourself.
In a healthy relationship or experience:
- There is no fear. Healthy relationships are built on love, respect, care and happiness.
- Each person feels valued. You understand each other's differences and treat each other with respect and courtesy.
- You feel equal. When decisions are made they are made together.
- When there is a disagreement, it is ok to talk about differences. The disagreement is worked out and both people involved get what they need.
- Your viewpoints are heard and respected. You are free to express your feelings and opinions.
- You are comfortable taking time alone if you need it. It feels okay to do some things separately.
- No one tries to control or restrict you. You feel encouraged and supported.
- Even when you are busy, you make time for one another and your relationship.
- You have a circle of people who know and support you as a couple. You spend time with friends who also have strong healthy relationships
*Adapted from the Alberta Child and Youth Services, Healthy Relationships Information Sheet.
In an unhealthy relationship or experience, you may experience one or all of the following:
- You might feel intimidated by looks, gestures or threats. This may include threats to you, your loved ones, pets or property.
- You may be called names, insulted and regularly criticized.
- Someone may try to control or limit your contact with family, friends or other support networks. You may have to get permission to leave home, get an unusual number of texts or calls while you are out, or need to account for what you did while you were out.
- You have limited or no input when it comes to making decisions about your home life or social activities.
- You may not get the basic care that you need like food, medication or even a regular bath.
- You may experience a physical attack that includes pushing, shaking, punching, throwing objects or using a weapon.
- You may be exposed to unwanted sexual behavior or forced to participate in sexual activity which may include touching, kissing, oral contact or any kind of intercourse that happens without consent.
- Someone may take control of your income or resources to keep you in a state of dependence.
- Someone may make fun of your spiritual beliefs, not allow you to participate in, or force you to participate in, spiritual traditions, or attend spiritual institutions.
* Adapted from the Alberta Solicitor General, Victims Programs, Victims Advocate-Training Manual.
We are here to help, please call us.
1.403.237.58881-877-237-5888 Toll Free in Alberta
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